hashtagafreakingghost | Second 👻 Story [Anonymous Text]

[For the past few days, all Ashley's done is try to figure out how to get the PokéConnect anonymous. It'd been an idea in the back of her mind for a week or so and then- well, it became an urge and now here she is.]

I need to ask for some advice.
This might also turn out to be a moral question, maybe? I'm playing by ear.

The scenario:
You take part in something careless and thoughtlessly cruel. A tragedy occurs. One that costs lives. You've accidentally hurt a dear, close friend.
That friend then methodically and maliciously plans and carries out revenge that inadvertently puts your life, the lives of your friends, and their own life in danger.
What the hell do you do?
Is it right to be pissed when it's your fault it all happened?
IS it really your fault?
What's worse, a horrible accident or a plot purposely designed to hurt others?
How would you try to move forward?
How would you try to forgive yourself?
Do you deserve to?

Consider this a moral quandary if you will. I'd just really like some advice. Some opinions.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, as a Psychic type, she's often got a read on what's going on in my head. That's something I let her do, I'm comfortable with that and with her. So I let her know what my patterns are - which is one of those things I got to understand over the years, as someone who mostly had to deal with this on my own - and if she recognizes them, she lets me know I'm starting to wig out. Then I can employ the techniques I already know to pull myself out of it.

The other thing she does for me, since I've got something of a physical disability on top of that, is keep an eye on my surroundings to make sure I'm not about to take a fall. So, yeah, sort of exactly like a more traditional service animal in that regard. It's stabilizing to have that bodily sense of security. Might help in your case, too, to know that something's always got its eye out for your immediate non-mental well-being.

I suppose what I'm saying is, no, Pokémon aren't naturally experienced with this, just like humans aren't, either. But you can teach them just as well as you can teach yourself, and some of them got more of an aptitude for it than others. Psychic types are good, if they've got the right temperament. Probably the Chansey line - you know, the pink things the nurses got at the Pokémon Centers? If all the professionals got those in their corner, they're probably good at what they do.

I don't know if I'd want my Psychic types in my head. It's kind of obvious but I've got some messed up shit in there and, not like you or others don't, but I'm not really sure how to handle mine. Naturally.

Maybe it'll help though? I'm still getting to know my Pokemon. It's nice having them around, at least. I believe I have something that looks like a Chansey, though. It's just a kid. I don't want to put a burden on something so young.

Happiny, right? Yeah, my friend had one of those, but she's grown up now. They're natural caretakers, so yeah, when she's older, being able to help you's probably going to be a big source of pride for her, if you let her.

You want to share some of the messed up shit you've got going on in your head? Not in detail, I mean, I'm just asking about the practical stuff, the way you're experiencing it. If it's something like what I'm used to, I can at least suggest some tips for managing it.

One of those, yes. I'll consider it. When she's older.

Someone I've talked to says it sounds like PTSD. Flashbacks. Specific things mentioned putting me into a state of panic or fear. The inability to feel safe at any given time. The inability to sleep without nightmares, unless it's with help from a Munna.
Is that the something you're used to?

I was a soldier, back in the day. PTSD and I are old buddies at this point.

I'm not qualified to give you the kind of therapy you need if that's what you're going through, but I got a couple tricks to offer for some of the day to day difficulties. If you had to pick one thing, what would you say's hardest for you to handle right now?

The flashbacks I think?
They're the hardest to cope with at any given time. I hate feeling like I'm back there.

Those do get less frequent over time, at least. Remembering that helps.

If you realize you're in the middle of one, you gotta remind yourself that it is a flashback, and that whatever happened, you already got through it. Deep breaths are better than shallow ones, they'll help you calm down. And don't close your eyes or try to block it out. Instead, try to focus on what's really around you, like how many different colors you can count in the room or how something really cold feels in your hand. I like to make coffee, the smell brings me back to here instead of there.

I knew about the breathing but keeping your eyes open really helps? I usually try to block everything out.
And that's likely my problem I suppose.
I hope it'll work the next time one happens.

It takes practice. But yeah, grounding yourself in the real world can help alleviate the feeling of being back there.

Try practicing it when you're calm, beforehand. It'll make it easier to remember how to do it when the flashback does come, so you're not struggling to do something for the first time in the middle of all that.

Thank you.
This will hopefully help in the future. Having specific techniques and ideas is comforting, though. I like making plans.

Same. I always like to have a course of action ahead of me. Or several, once the first goes pear-shaped.

Think that's enough for you to chew on for now? I'd offer my number for any questions you might have later, but I'm all right being a ship passing in the night, too.

Yes, I've got a lot to think about already, so I think that's enough for now. I wouldn't want to do anything to make you feel uncomfortable, disclosing your identity I mean.

It takes a lot to make someone my age uncomfortable. I just figured sometimes these things are easier when both parties are wearing the ol' paper bag.

That is true.
But, is there anywhere I can contact you about that idea you mentioned?
The spare PokeGear? Because I think that has a lot of merit.

Yeah, I'm gonna look into that, play around with what's possible or not. If it ends up working out, I'll make a post with it and slide the word "foxtrot" in there so you know it's me. Sound good?

A codeword. That sounds wonderful, yes. Thank you for all of this. Not just the advice, but the future plans.

Hey. You're welcome. Take care now.

Second 👻 Story [Anonymous Text]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject